At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
