remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
