I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
