like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Randomize
