She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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