I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Randomize
