Do you still have your period?
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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