Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Ladies don't puke and tell
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
