There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
What drink are we having for lunch?
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
