You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Randomize
