Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize
