let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
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