Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Randomize
