We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
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