I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
