we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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