oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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