i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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