Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Randomize