In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
