Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
