hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
