Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Randomize
