I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
