O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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