I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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