So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Randomize
