Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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