can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
