Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
He called his prostate his "boner button".
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
