you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
