i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Terrible idea I love it
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
