Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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