they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
