so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
