there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
