chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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