Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize
