Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize
