I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize