wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
