is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I have post one night stand depression
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize