shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize