i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
