i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
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