I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize