youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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