i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
you inspire me to be a worse person
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Randomize
