This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Randomize
