Please, let me fuck your mom
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize
