I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
