Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
do nipples grow back?
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
